With snow on the ground and New Smyrna Speedweeks underway, let’s have some fun. Periodically I feel that it is my responsibility to find out how well informed about Modified racing that our readers are. Fell free to respond with the answers to the multiple choice questions below to me by email. Please include MSS TEST on the subject line. As always, incorrect answers that humor me get extra credit.

1. The best thing that Ted Christopher could do to win the WMT championship is:
a. Lock Tony Hirschman in a phone booth.
b. Get [CENSORED] to stop writing about him.
c. Call his tire guy Harry.

2. Over the winter, team owners were most likely to:
a. Buy a new jack.
b. Hire a jackman named Jack.
c. Get a call from a promoter named Jack.

3. The best thing about Modified bumpers is:
a. They are disposable.
b. They don’t have a stupid plastic cover over them.
c. They look mean.

4. If a fan of the Whelen Modified Tour goes to Martinsville this year they should:
a. Stay at the Dutch Inn.
b. Eat at Elizabeth’s Pizza.
c. Fly into Greensboro and rent a car.

5. Tony Hirschman’s best chance to three-peat would include:
a. His son Matt calling shots for him from the seat of his car.
b. Bob Bruneau power.
c. Getting locked in a phone booth. (Then we might all get to see his cape.)

6. The show for casual fans of the WMT not to miss this season is:
a. The Whelen Made in America 300 at Martinsville.
b. The New Hampshire 100 at Loudon in July.
c. The Whelen Modified Tour has no casual fans. They are all certifiable fanatics.

7. Tony Ferrante, Jr. is:
a. Retired
b. Possibly retired.
c. Let’s face it; we will see Tony in 2006.

8. The best seat in the house at Riverhead Raceway is:
a. The top of the Pit Stand.
b. The top of the Turn 1 Grandstand.
c. Next to Glenn Sullivan.

9. To win the WMT championship it takes:
a. Cubic dollars.
b. Geometrically increasing cubic dollars.
c. A smart team and a smarter driver.

10. The race most likely to be postponed due to rain is:
a. The Icebreaker.
b. The Sizzler.
c. The Fall Final.
d. The World Series.

11. The most under appreciated person on a Touring team is:
a. The tire guy.
b. The tire guy.
c. The guy who mounts all of those tires.

12. Radio communications:
a. Provide for remote control racing.
b. Are incredibly entertaining.
c. Often lead drivers to make mistakes they wouldn’t have made without them.

13. The best short cut out of a WMT track is:
a. Across the LIPA property to Kroemer Avenue out of Riverhead.
b. Hyde Park Road out of Stafford.
c. E. Thompson Rd. to Sand Dam Rd. to Porter Plain Rd. out of Thompson.
d. There are no short cuts worth taking.

14. The best way to make the WMT more exciting would be:
a. Let the teams use bigger carburetors.
b. Unlimited tire change rule.
c. Mandatory spouse or significant other as riding mechanic. (Have fun Dave and Renee!)

15. The best reason for the WMT teams to go to Lime Rock Park:
a. It would be an interesting race and Lime Rock is a great place for the fans.
b. A photo shoot.
c. Are you (expletive deleted) kidding me!

16. All of the members of teams that tamper with their tires should be:
a. Fined heavily and suspended.
b. Suspended from the highest tree in the area.
c. Forced to shave their heads and walk backwards for a month.

17. The 8:45PM boat out of New London:
a. Is the last chance to get home.
b. Is full of racing folks on Tour weekends at Stafford and Thompson.
c. Has its’ Captain calling the Southold Police to get the racers out of the bar.

18. Time trials are:
a. The way that the WMT determines which cars qualify for an event.
b. Exciting.
c. As exciting as watching Supreme Court confirmation hearings.

19. The camper area is:
a. Where one might come across Harry.
b. Full of alcohol.
c. The place to find dirt (Literally and figuratively).

20. The reason that you have completed this test is:
a. I thought the educational experience would expand my mind.
b. I am a professional test taker.
c. I didn’t take this test! (Liar)
d. I have no life before the Icebreaker.

The entrant that gets the highest score wins a photo opportunity with Ernie and the Cup. Second place gets a 2006 NEXTEL Cup Schedule.